lucid_symbollic

I`m over it

2004-03-04T21:48:35Z

Tina Tigue AKA porn Star Phoenixxx Blaque is a BITCH, talk about a nut case....more later, I`m off to go see PRIMUS

hot tub

2004-03-02T18:24:10Z

getting a hot tub today, the friend of my uncle who bought his old house in south Tampa is getting a new hot tub and asked me if I wanted the old one....Hell Yeah, it`s in perfect shape, it`s the same one that my uncle owned when he lived there, so, I`m gonna store it out back here until the deal goes through on the house (more on that later) ok freaks, I`m out
Peace 93

a New family member

2004-02-28T21:00:56Z

I GOT IT!!! yep, I traded in my 2 Charvel guitars on a black Randy Rhoads Jackson warped flying V and it kicks ass!!!
I am so jazzed, it sounds great, plays great and I couldn`t be happier, gonna work on some new music today and night SOOOOOOOO.......
Peace ya`all

Cats

2004-02-25T22:07:44Z

almost forgot, we got 4...Count `em...4 (I know you won`t but fuckin` count them anyway!!!) we got "Fizzer" (the world`s most beautiful cat....even if he is a butter ball turkey) "Shop Cat" (a cat that can`t even pick a color to be, a calico...figures) "Diva", (the little kitten/siameses MONSTER, totally out of control, won`t leave Fizzer alone and wants to attack every cat in the house)....then there`s my familier..."Morganna" a 16 year old black cat that is my world, she is everything a person could ever hope for, she was taken from me after a break up, got loose and found her way back to me OVER a mile away PLUS, she picked me to begin with, that is real LOVE

a side note

2004-02-25T19:46:59Z

it`s the funniest thing, Diva (the the little monster, crazy girl kittie) LOVES to sleep in my guitar case and I can`t bring myself to close it and put it away, I swear, it`s the cats`s world, we just live in it, Fizzer and Diva are the cutiest together, gonna post some pics

wet day Wed.

2004-02-25T19:33:36Z

not much to say today, trying to get all my money stuff together for tax time, gonna try and see about a few houses and a possible car deal as well (a family friend has a car that is a 2000 and mine is a `96 SOOOOO :) already started work on my new CD, it`s going pretty well (but not much sleep, I work best at 3:00am it seems)
ok FREAKS, Peace Out 93

What Was It That You Said?

2004-02-23T15:59:03Z

oh yeah, here`s another poem I wrote

What was it that you said,
you wished that I was dead?
When all this time we
Played together
Worked together
Fought together
Loved together
Cried together
Laughed together
Build a world only to tear it to shreds ?
Exposed our inner selves to one another
Only to have them crushed beneath your stiletto heels
And my whiskey cheers
Do you have an inner soul ?
Does it bleed like mine ?
True love comes once a life time
And you were mine
I made mistakes
My biggest mistake was to LOVE too much
It scares you I know
It`s so much easier to let things come and go
So easy to walk away
When the Love isn`t real but play
No one hurts
No one cries
No emptiness
No soul that dies
I miss your smile
I miss your laugh
My minds eye goes back in time
To a place that was yours and mine
There`s too much water under the bridge
But Love is thicker than water
It`s so easy to focus on the bad times
Make those the most important things
But the truth is this
Real Love is just that
REAL

Monday Monday Monday

2004-02-23T15:55:04Z

not much to other than it`s FUCKIN` MONDAY!!! heading to take a shower then work, graded animation projects, got a quiz all lined up for my afternoon class, gonna call Al at the guitar center about the "V" and see what we can set up, feeling a bit better,
Peace ya all
93

oh well

2004-02-23T01:54:47Z

Al wasn`t in today at the guitar center so I just chilled, gotta call tomorrow, read some interesting things, you know, it`s not easy being someone so hated but, I grew up that way so it`s ok, I try to do the right thing but as usual, it`s always wrong, what the fuck, one day I`ll be dead and it won`t matter, can`t wait for that...ok, well, whatever
Peace 93

new guitar day

2004-02-22T16:44:39Z

well well, looks like I`m going to trade in my pink and black Charvel guitar (YES, I said PINK, it`s a guitar I got from a pawn shop, plays great but....IT`S FUCKING PINK) I found a Randy Rhoads warped flying V Jackson (a real one) used at the guitar center (and it`s all nice and BLACK, can`t go wrong with BLACK) gonna pick that up and a Korg synth pad, new CD is in the works as we speak, more on that later

Peace 93

yada yada yada

2004-02-21T00:52:15Z

not much to say, did my usual, went to the mall, picked up a couple of CD`s (replacment CD`s, My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult and Metallica, both were ruined) came home for a nap and that`s about it, gee, what an interesting life huh?

MAKING THE MONEY

2004-02-20T11:00:35Z

MAKING THE MONEY

Take a shower
Shave those legs
Put on the make up
Dig deeper the grave
Look for an outfit
Something sexy yet cheap
Matching heels, matching soul
What you sow you will reap

Making the money
Puts you in control
Making the money
Is that your final goal ?

What time is it now
Time to do your show
Sit back, get comfortable
Place the money that you owe
Don`t say anything sweetie
I`ll take it from here
Lay back and enjoy this
There`s nothing left to fear

Making the money
Day in and day out
Making the money
Do you have your doubts ?

The mind of a poet
The body of a whore
The artist that is in you
Doesn`t it want more
More
More more more more more MORE !!!

I watch you through this screen
I see you struggle through
So much I see in you
What`s left that I can do ?

Making the money
Strangers every night
Making the money
The morning shows the light
Making the money
Your control it is a lie
Making the money
It`s just another way to die
Making the money
Do you feel your in control
Making the money
Or do you feel you`ve lost your soul ?

Making the……….what ?

PEDISTALS

2004-02-20T10:56:54Z

PEDISTALS

You see them on T.V.
You buy all their CD`s
Hero whorship on the grandest scale
Bigger than life
Greek GODS
No one can come close
In your eyes
Forged of marble and stone
Perfect, for your eyes alone

Write your fantasies
The perfect world to be
The truth, you`ll never see

Rise them up on a pedestal
So perfect you can tell
Made for you, under your spell
All your dreams on a pedestal

Always being the victim
Your hero`s ready to save you
Call to them in fantasy
Your GODS only enslave you

And it begins

2004-02-18T16:38:00Z

I should have done this a LOOOOONG time ago,
HELLO ALL!!! YES, it`s true, I`m the "EVIL EX" of Phoenixxx Blaque (Tampa Florida Porn wannabe, Slut, Cheap Whore at a shop here and all around fucked up BITCH)

yep, you can fuck her (with or without condoms, depending on what you pay) for a price.
the serious problem here is the risk factor, I posted on her lournal about this BUT (of course) she took it down, WELL here`s the real deal....

I met her going on 9 years ago or more
she was a sex phone girl then
she wanted to be a Porn Star, I feel for "THE GIRL" but the Porn thing was always the big deal
during my 5 + years with her, we did a Hell of a lot of work in the Porn biz together (all her pics and videos and everything was from when we were together...ALL wanted by HER for her career) of course, true to form, she now blaims me for her doing everything YET at the same time, almost 4 years later, she still posts every extreme pic of herself AND has done even more, figure that one out???

NOW, to the heart of the matter
she cheated and fucked around on me with most of my friends (which arn`t friends anymore, a real friend wouldn`t do that) what gets me is SHE laid the ground rules of an open relationship, we don`t go behind each other`s backs, I NEVER did, she did a ton of time, I loved her and took her back each time.

soon after we got together (about 6 months) she had her first outbreak of Herpies (that she never told me about and swore that wasn`t what it was) she told me that she had been getting these "outbreaks" for a few years now and it was just a "skin condistion" I realized what was up early on (and thankfully, dodged my first bullet)
I finnally got her to go to the Doctor during an outbreak and he told her, "you have Herpies", at last she couldn`t tell me she didn`t have it (but she tells no one now, even though she has sex for money) he gave her a perscription that she never took and never followed (in her messed up mind, if she ignores it, it isn`t real)

next comes the Lieing, Cheating and yes...DISEASES!!!
this is the main reason behind this post
during my time with her she had caught...Gonnoria )which she gave to a Guy named Cory that she was cheating on me with AND throwing it in my face that she was in Love with him UNTIL she gave him a disease and he left her (also, a side note, I told her to move in with him if that`s how she felt, he said no...LOL)

on to Siffulis and the Clap and the HIV scare, yes, she`s had both of the first two
luckily enough (yet unluck for a friend) there was some talk about a couple we knew that the female ended up with HIV, Phoenixxx had played with her a few times and it was thought that she had given it or gotten it from her (Phoenixxx has NEVER gotten an HIV test sense then, she`s too scared to get on....I have and dodged a second bullet luclily)

the break up!!! we break up, she ends up marrying a friend, they are together for a couple of years (now remember, this is a girl that after we were together "and I seen her book/record/score card, that told me at age 25 that she had had over 75 "BOYFRIENDS" with info on each one written down in a journal, creeped me out)
well as she`s written, the marriage is now over, what she didn`t say is that he called me and told me why, she`s cheating and also gave him the Clap from her job, he desided when they were at the doctors office, and he was looking at her (with a Herpies outbreak as well) that he`d had enough

so I`m posting this (of course, as the EX FROM HELL) as a warning to you guys that go see her, this is all true and can be easily be proved, your call now

ok, there`s my first post

Peace 93